tip: if you ever feel the need to do an ‘experiment’ on a friend and never message them first, just to see if they actually make any effort and initiate contact, don’t be surprised if they think that you’re the one that walked out on them.
you’re clueless, aren’t you?
I swear nearly every single person I met through church is poison. never. ever. again.
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posted:1 month ago
“Since you’ve been gone my life has moved along, quite nicely actually.”
Dunno if it is, but if that’s about me - you’re a selfish cunt.
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posted:1 month ago
find me a music school without bias, favouritism, all that other classical music shit, and I’ll transfer there in a heartbeat. sick of being treat like shit. sick of motivation having to come from trying to change peoples ideas of me and to prove people wrong.
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posted:2 months ago
❝
We were discussing homosexuality because of an allusion to it in the book we were reading, and several boys made comments such as, “That’s disgusting.” We got into the debate and eventually a boy admitted that he was terrified/disgusted when he was once sharing a taxi and the other male passenger made a pass at him.The lightbulb went off. “Oh,” I said. “I get it. See, you are afraid, because for the first time in your life you have found yourself a victim of unwanted sexual advances by someone who has the physical ability to use force against you.” The boy nodded and shuddered visibly.“But,” I continued. “As a woman, you learn to live with that from the time you are fourteen, and it never stops. We live with that fear every day of our lives. Every man walking through the parking garage the same time you are is either just a harmless stranger or a potential rapist. Every time.” The girls in the room nodded, agreeing. The boys seemed genuinely shocked. “So think about that the next time you hit on a girl. Maybe, like you in the taxi, she doesn’t actually want you to.
oh I didn’t walk away on you. you put a wall up between us a long time ago now. and if you push people away enough, eventually they will stop coming back.
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posted:2 months ago
it’s like the only way to be treated with respect in a classical music degree is you have to have spent your life learning with a top end teacher from the beginning, gone to a good school and not have to work while studying.
every single violin student I know who is being treat fairly is either one of the talented-with-no-effort ones, has had good $120/a lesson teachers for years, went to VCASS/an inner eastern suburbs private school, and the many who get so many parental handouts that they don’t have to work a single day while they’re studying, so have all the time in the world.
it’s very hard not to be bitter. it’s very hard to ignore favoritism. there are only so many times I can be told I can’t play the violin until I start believing it, and never play again.
I wish I could make this motivate me.
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posted:2 months ago
this music degree is the worst thing for my sense of self worth.
brotip: sort yourself out emotionally, then do one. or just be one of the favorites or talented ones.
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posted:2 months ago
